When I sit on the pier and wait for that black abyss to swell and spit out your letters, my heart rises and falls with the water, and sometimes, I just wish it would swallow me. Heaven: the expanse above the tide rising and beneath the rain falling. I swear sometimes breathing feels just like drowning, stuck here in between.
But when your bottles float in, there is nothing as beautiful as their dim glow, and my heart longs after them. Their colors catch my eye, dank bourbon or molded green protecting white sheets painted with calligraphic handwriting, tainted with damp expressions of the bottle's history, but purely you... Purely you.
I've been thinking about just what "beauty" is, but no amount of thinking has added beauty to it.
All I know is that it points beyond itself, like I long beyond your love notes, like I long for you.
I've seen the entire spectrum refracting off the ripples beneath my bare feet from the edge of this weathered dock, and thought God, there's got to be more than this.
I have no idea what to believe, but beauty pulls me beyond myself like I don't even have a choice, so I know I don't believe in nothing.
Where, my love, does the beauty inside of a tree reside, made up of atoms, identical and colorless, where the light of the sun merely vibrates in waves toward our eyes, striking tissues and moving along nerves like a telephone wire, to their endings, like telephones? I do not know. There is no actual color in the atoms of which the tree is composed, or in those vibrations. Shape, size, color, touch and the like are simply the names we call our sensations, and no amount of study can ever bring the notion of beauty to the tree...
When I don't know how, help me embrace the mystery.
Will you come home? This tree house won't be that without you.
supported by 10 fans who also own “Chapter Seven: Orphan Theism”
Julien Baker is an acquired taste - assuming of course you’ve acquired great taste in singer songwriters… beautiful, devastating, honest, insightful… I’ve not heard a single song of hers that hasn’t left me in absolute awe. crisbroadhurst
Poet Douglas Kearney and composer/producer/drummer Val Jeanty link up for a a compelling LP that feels like the written word come to life. Bandcamp New & Notable Mar 30, 2021
supported by 9 fans who also own “Chapter Seven: Orphan Theism”
Musically this feels more experimental for La Dispute reminding me of their Here, Hear releases. Very atmospheric and easy to lose your self in. Perfect for the next time you’re contemplating your existence. (Also found out the guitarist builds his own pedals and used them on this record; neato!) Mikey